I Used to Scroll Past Relationship Advice… Like a lot of people, I’ve been through a rough divorce. The kind that knocks the wind out of you and leaves you questioning everything. These days, when clips about relationships or breakups pop up on my social feed, I usually scroll past without thinking.
On my worst days, I might watch one or two—to feel less alone, or maybe just to feel something. But most of the time, I avoid them altogether. Until one day, a video caught my attention—and changed something in me.
Unexpected Wisdom The video featured James Sexton, a high-profile divorce attorney. He was sitting across from an interviewer, arms folded, giving what I’d come to learn is his signature no-nonsense delivery. He said: “People don’t fall out of love.
They just stop doing the things that made them fall in love in the first place.” It wasn’t what I expected from a guy who’s built a career out of watching relationships crash and burn. But it hit me—hard. Here was someone who sees the worst of love, reminding us what keeps it alive.
I was intrigued. Down the Sexton-Rabbit Hole I clicked on another clip. Then another.
Before I knew it, I was deep in what I now call the Sexton-verse. And honestly? It was addictive.
Like binging a true crime series—only the crime was love gone wrong, and the detective was this dry-witted divorce lawyer who somehow made me feel seen. James Sexton isn’t what you expect. Sure, he’s sharp and unapologetic.
He drops lines like: “No one gets divorced because of one big thing. It’s always death by a thousand paper cuts.” But it’s not just about the punchlines. It’s about the truth behind them.
And it’s the truth so many of us need to hear. More Than Just a Divorce Attorney? What surprised me most was how much Sexton seemed to care—not just about the end of relationships, but about saving them.
At one point, he said: “My job isn’t breaking people up. My job is cleaning up the mess after they do it themselves.” At first, I thought it was just clever branding. But the more I listened, the more I realized: he’s trying to help people stop making the same mistakes.
That’s probably why he’s become a go-to voice in the relationship space. He’s been on podcasts like Lex Fridman, Soft White Underbelly, Modern Wisdom, and even Diary of a CEO. This morning I saw he was booked on my favorite podcast, The Huberman Lab (because apparently, even brain scientists are looking for clarity on love.)
And it’s not just academics or therapists who are tuning in. His interviews pull in massive audiences. His podcast clips and his own TikTok channel rack up millions of views.
Changing the Conversation Around Divorce Look, divorce is never going away. But that doesn’t mean we can’t prepare ourselves better—for marriage, for conflict, for communication. Sexton’s books, If You’re In My Office, It’s Already Too Late and How to Stay in Love, aren’t just advice for after the fact.
They’re roadmaps for avoiding disaster in the first place. One line that stuck with me: “People spend more time planning their wedding than they do preparing for their marriage.” That one stings. But it also sticks.
Because it’s true. And it’s the kind of tough love that might’ve helped me see the signs earlier—or at least helped me feel less alone when things fell apart. Making Prenups Practical—and Even Empowering?!
Sexton’s latest project, one that I saw him talk to comedian Andrew Schultz and Joy Behar from The View about is TrustedPrenup.com, and it's doing something radical: making prenups accessible for regular people. After years of crafting elite contracts for the rich and famous, he’s building a platform for the rest of us. “Why should only the rich get to protect themselves?” It’s a bold stance, but it makes sense.
And weirdly, he’s managed to make prenups feel less scary, less taboo—even empowering. I didn't have a prenup. Like many people, I thought bringing one up meant I didn't trust my partner.
That it meant we were quietly planning for failure. But then I heard Sexton: "Of Course I trust your driving- but I'm still going to wear my seatbelt." That one line reframed everything.
Where was this kind of wisdom 20 years ago? Why I’m Writing This It’s a strange thing, writing an article about a divorce attorney I’ve never met. A man whose profession once triggered all my worst memories.
And yet, here I am. Less bitter. More open.
Maybe even hopeful. I used to scroll through relationship content just to feel better about my own pain. Now, I find myself wanting to help others avoid it.
And that shift didn’t come from a therapist or a self-help guru—it came from a guy who’s seen what happens when love goes off the rails. “If you want to know why a marriage failed, don’t ask the people who were in it. Ask their friends.
They saw it coming.” Sexton has a way of saying the things we’re too scared to admit—but exactly what we need to hear. So… Will I Ever Marry Again? Honestly?
I don’t know. But if a man who makes a living ending marriages can become one of the most trusted voices on how to save them—then anything is possible. And maybe that’s the point.
